You, Me, and Baby Makes Three: Female Sexual Health after Childbirth

Have you ever heard a new parent say that if they had to choose between sleep and sex, they would choose sleep? This statement can be shocking to hear, especially for those who don't have infants or young children in the home. Tons of things change when little ones come into your life—everything from sleep, mood, relationship dynamic, vehicle choices, and of course, your sex life can be impacted in some way.

A woman’s sexual desire can ebb and flow throughout her lifetime. For women who have given birth, the pregnancy and postpartum periods in particular can be a time of change in terms of one’s level of sexual desire. During pregnancy it is extremely common for women to experience fluctuating levels of sexual desire, so the amount of sexual activity that a woman and her partner engage in during pregnancy tends to vary from couple to couple. However, there seems to be a steep drop in sexual interest and activity after childbirth, for both the birthmother and her partner. In fact, research has shown that 86% of women and 88% of men report having sexual problems after the birth of a child.

During childbirth, there are many physical changes that happen to a woman’s body, and these changes may be responsible for some of the sexual problems couples experience after the birth of a child. For example, women who give birth vaginally are at risk of experiencing genital tearing, having an episiotomy (surgically planned incision on the perineum during labour), or having an assisted birth that requires instruments like a vacuum extractor or forceps to help pull the baby out. These factors can cause injury to the genital area (genital trauma), which is associated with painful intercourse (dyspareunia) in the first few months postpartum. Women who experience genital trauma during childbirth also tend to wait longer after childbirth to start having penetrative sexual activities again.

In the Sexual Health Research Lab (SexLab), we are aware that “sex” is way more than just penis-in-vagina intercourse; but unfortunately, most of the research on postpartum sexuality focuses on penis-in-vagina sex and the pain that it might cause.  That said, genital trauma can still affect all sorts of aspects of sexual function, like sexual satisfaction, desire, and orgasmic ability. Given all of these potential negative effects that a vaginal birth can have on a woman’s – and her partner’s – sex life, one might assume that having a Caesarean section (C-section) would prevent any sexual problems in the postpartum. In fact, recent surveys of Canadian women and men have found that a common reason for preferring a C-section over a vaginal birth is the belief that C-sections are better for a couple’s future sex life. Another recent study found that many women believe that having vaginal birth makes a woman’s vagina “loose” or “used”.

Okay, so it seems as though the general public opinion is that having a vaginal birth will lead to sexual problems. So, if women are concerned about their future sex life, then they should all have C-sections, right? Well let’s hold our horses – before we start writing off vaginal births all together, let’s see what the research actually tells us, shall we?

Drum roll please…. most studies that examine many different aspects of sexual function (e.g., sexual desire, sexual satisfaction, dyspareunia, etc.) have not found a difference in the self-reported sexual functioning between women who have had a vaginal birth and women who have had a C-section. These studies usually give questionnaires to women asking about their sex lives and interest in sex. In SexLab, we can objectively measure sexual function using some neat equipment, in addition to questionnaires. One way that we can measure sexual function is to look at sensitivity in the genito-pelvic region. There is some research to suggest that women who are more sensitive to touch and heat in those regions have better sexual function than those who are less sensitive to touch and heat. We can also measure sexual arousal by using special equipment to measure blood flow to the genitals while participants watch erotic films.

So, why does SexLab care about postpartum sexual function and whether it’s better or worse or the same after a vaginal birth or a C-section? Well, we believe that it is important to understand how different modes of delivery can potentially impact a couple’s sex life given that the rate of C-sections are increasing worldwide, with rates in Canada (26.9%) almost doubling the World Health Organization (WHO) recommended rate of 15%. In fact, in some South American countries, the rates of C-sections are as high as almost 50% of all births! Although it is unclear why this trend is occurring, some people suggest that this is because more women than ever are specifically requesting to have a C-section. It is possible that one of the reasons some women are requesting C-sections is because they are worried about the impact that having a vaginal birth will have on their future sex life. Granted, most people feel that sex is an important aspect of their lives, which means it is equally as important for women to know all of the facts (or at least what the research tells us thus far) when it comes to sex and childbirth.

To answer all these questions, the SexLab is conducting two studies to examine postpartum sexuality. The first is an online study for women who have not given birth to find out about perceptions of and preferences for pregnancy and childbirth, specifically as they relate to female sexuality. If you are a woman (18+) who has not given birth and are interested in completing this online survey, please click here: https://queensu.fluidsurveys.com/s/childbirthperceptions/. Please note that while we welcome all sexual orientations and gender identities, at this time we are only recruiting DFAB individuals (i.e., designated female at birth). Individuals who participate in the survey can be entered into a prize draw for an Amazon gift card.

The second study compares sexual function among women who have had a vaginal birth, women who have had a C-section, and women who have never given birth, by measuring things like genital sensitivity and genital blood flow. If you are a new mother (i.e., you had your first child within the last 2 years) in the Kingston, Ontario area and would like to participate in our study, please contact SexLab (email: sex.lab@queensu.ca or telephone: 613-533-3276).

Jackie Cappell, M.Sc. Ph.D. Candidate, Clinical Psychology, Queen's University

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What if You Can’t Have Sex?

Sex! It’s passionate and earth-shattering. Or loving and tender. It can bring you intense pleasure, relax you, express your love, and even make a baby. But what if you can’t have sex?

While there are many pleasurable sexual activities—like kissing, stroking, and oral sex to name just a few—when it comes to discussing heterosexual sex, the word “sex” is often assumed to mean penis in vagina intercourse (PVI). But not everyone in a heterosexual relationship is able to have PVI. Vaginismus, pelvic pain, erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, and sexual fear or phobia are some of the reasons a person might not be able to have PVI. This can be quite distressing for some couples who expected to be able to have “sex” with no problem.

My interest in this topic began during my work as a sex therapist, working with couples who were unable to have PVI. Couples in this situation often report feeling very isolated, and may not have told anyone else about what they see as a problem. If they have sought help before meeting with me, they often have difficulty finding qualified service providers with experience in this area. For example, women with vaginismus—a condition where muscle tightness or spasm makes intercourse painful or impossible—are often told simply to relax, have a glass of wine, or use lubricant. This unhelpful response may in part be due to the limited research on the topic.

In the research literature, the inability to have PVI is referred to as being in an unconsummated marriage or unconsummated relationship. A lot of the research focuses on medical treatment, leaving out the relationship and psychological factors and what it is like to actually be unable to have PVI. As a PhD student, I’m now trying to address this gap. As part of my dissertation I’m interested in talking to people in heterosexual relationships who have been unable to have PVI. Are you interested in sharing your story? If so, you’d take part in an interview with me. The interview will take place in-person or online via video call. During the interview, I’ll ask you about your experiences of being in a relationship and unable to have PVI. I want to know about any advantages and disadvantages of being in a relationship without PVI.

The information gained from this study may be used to guide future research and to inform the work of sex therapists and other clinicians. For more information about the study, please contact me at ambairstow@mail.widener.edu.

Adrienne Bairstow Sex Therapist and PhD student Center for Human Sexuality Studies, Widener University